Stress? Bring it On!
Stress. The name itself is synonymous with all negativity in our lives. We stress out about our kids, parents, work, school, traffic, food; the list goes on with things that are both in and out of our control. But if you actually think about what stress really is, is it inherently bad? Let’s look at this another way. How do our muscles grow? We subject them to external stress and they adapt. What kind and how much stress dictates our rate of adaptation. So if our bodies’ natural response is to adapt, why do we seem to crumble? If this is a learned behavior, do we have to accept it or can we emotionally adapt the way our muscles do physically? I believe that we can take the stress and use it to our advantage. We have been told for years that stress causes most illness; our happiness is of the utmost importance and we need to put ourselves first so we can deal with everything else. This could be why we now see so much entitled behavior. We aren’t taught to cope, but rather to avoid anything or anyone that causes stress and remove the negativity from our lives. If we do that and live a stress free life, how do we learn to adapt? How do we learn to cope? Most research in the past that showed stress caused illness was missing one important variable. How did the subjects manage their stress? And what were the subjects’ coping mechanisms? More research has been done with these variables in mind and new information has been found. Recent studies done by the University of Wisconsin-Madison and other places have shown stress itself doesn’t cause illness but rather changes in our physiological, emotional and behavioral responses when under stress that can lead to disease. Chronic stress is defined as a "state of prolonged tension from internal or external stressors, which may cause various physical manifestations – e.g., asthma, back pain, arrhythmias, fatigue, headaches, irritable bowel syndrome, ulcers, and suppress the immune system.” This is something that most of us have heard before and why we believe we are stressed and therefore obviously suffer from (insert illness here). Now this is where the tough love comes in. Stop it! Do not accept the fate that our lives are stressful and we have to suffer through it. Our lives are the byproduct of our decisions. It isn’t the stress that gets us; it’s our lack of positive coping strategies and our belief that we deserve better. You only deserve better when you work to be better. Earn your better! Are you overweight? Quit eating food that doesn’t nourish your body. Do you have immobility? Move more! Are you tired? Gather more energy from the last two suggestions. We have the ability to change. Every action and every inaction has a consequence. Do not be a victim in your life. Meet your stress head on and do something about it. Realize that some things are out of your control, and that’s OK, but most things aren’t. As Ghandi said, “be the change you wish to see in the world.” Every incredible person I have ever known in my life has been exposed to monumental stress. They have lived through truly horrible events, situations or years of struggle. They have come out the other side better. They are people of extraordinary character, and I value being a part of their lives. In contrast, most people I find difficult to be around are the ones that think the world owes them something and that life isn’t fair. They don’t want to work for anything and expect something for nothing. We all have to decide who we want to be and how we want to be remembered.
I have a working list on how to successfully adapt to stress to be a better person:
Take responsibility for your actions - If you do it, own it.
Argue to be heard but never to win.
Treat people the way you want to be treated and never based on how they treat you.
Lead by example.
Train your body even if you think you can’t.
Spend less time trying to be happy and more time trying to be useful.
Be a person of your word. Integrity is not negotiable.
Be grateful every day.
Use your stress as fuel. Strength is a choice.
